4 unanswered questions.

It is an undeniable fact that we as humans, are gifted (or in another perspective, plagued) by curiosity. There's always something that we must ask, or some mind itch that we just have to scratch without which we would be perpetually tormented by wonder.

Of course, I am no exception.

I've struck people with random questions before, and few, if ever, manage to provide me with a satisfactory answer, so I've decided to put it out here for people to read and if anyone should happen to know the answer to a particular question, please feel free to answer it.

Question 1: Why are there gay bars, and there are lesbian bars, but there are no homosexual co-ed bars?

I asked this question just last night to a couple of friends at a gay bar, and none of them could really answer it, save one; and he says that it's because most lesbians are men haters. This is probably a stereotypical answer, but it does so far provide a rather solid explanation. I mean, you see gay men getting along quite well with women (straight or otherwise) but I have not as yet seen the opposite. Answered? You tell me.

Question 2: Since this relates to the first post, I'll ask it first; Why is it that its almost normal to see heterosexual girls kissing other heterosexual girls, but you'd need to cut an arm to see a straight dude kiss another dude?

My personal answer is because men are quite knocked up with testosterone; the hormone that makes you punch your best friend in the face to tell him that you love him. Ask any guy to pat another guy on the shoulder for more than 10 seconds, and they'll get awkward. Don't even talk about lip to lip action.

Why girls are okay with it? Still a mystery to me.

Question 3: Where would you go in the case of a zombie outbreak?

No seriously. Think about it. In case Malaysia suddenly had a zombie infestation, where would you go for safety? A friend of mine answered "the mall". Obviously, if he was in a zombie movie, he would be the first to go. Look, I don't care what Dawn of the Dead said, but if there was a zombie outbreak, I highly doubt that going to a building that's always full of people is suicidal. They're the zombie factories, genius. Imagine walking into midvalley and having a million zombie shoppers charge at you. Dead meat buddy. Try again.

Another friend of mine suggested getting into a plane and flying to some solitary island. Yeah. Imagine Pangkor, Redang, Perhentian or Sipadan empty. Uh-huh. Maybe if it was some dead land in the middle of nowhere. You'd need a pilot, and a plane capable of landing in the water.

And assuming zombies can't swim/walk underwater.

Maybe.

My suggestion? Camp in some forest somewhere. You may encounter some other zombie campers, but hey, if you can't deal with a bunch of dead campers, there's no hope for you buddy.

Question 4: What happens if you were to cut off an erect penis?

It was a question for a story I was thinking up. Since the penis is boneless and simply made up of blood vessels that become erect with increased blood flow, I estimate that it'll gush gallons of blood, kinda like firemen water hoses. Which would kill you pretty quickly, from the blood loss, and if that doesn't do it, then the knowledge of just being castrated of your manhood will.

Feel free to answer any of the above questions, I will be grateful to you for having scratched my brain.

People do and say the dumbest things, I swear...

...it's true. Let me list some of the things I've heard or personally experienced myself.

1. The Microbacteria.

I was walking out of the gym the other day when I saw three gym employees. A woman was walking along telling this other guy, "You know, there's a thing called microbacteria..." before they entered gym and the conversation was cut off.

I would've loved to listen to their conversation, since of course, everybody knows that all bacteria are huge, macrosized giants.

2. The address.

So a friend of mine sent an email to all her relatives to ask for their home addresses, to send them celebratory post cards. She probably failed to mention that she wanted home adresses, but nevertheless, her relatives did send an address back; the same email adresses she sent out that email to.

3. This conversation happened to my friend and her friend and I was in the car.

"What is this building?" *pointing to a hospital*
"A hospital."
"Oh."
"Yah."
"....is it 24 hours?"

4. The Devil wears Prada.

I went to watch a movie (The Devil wears Prada) with a friend once, and she's nice and I like her, but I'll never forget this little conversation we had after the movie.

Me: How did you like the movie?
Her: Oh it was nice. Just that it wasn't what I thought it would be.
Me: Oh? What were you expecting?
Her: Well, I thought it would be a movie about the devil. You know, with the horns and pitchfork.

5. How would you like your steak?

A friend and I had dinner at TGIF once, and he ordered the steak. Naturally the waiter asked, "How would you like it?" before my friend gave it some thought and said,

"Small, please."

Feel free to share more stupid stories with me.

Let's suppose that we'd want to save the world...

...can anyone tell me where the hell do we start?