I haven't written in a while, and honestly, I am rather ashamed that I haven't.

I could blame it on a lack of inspiration, but really, can any respectable writer blame that false villain, the writer's block?

I think I can attribute it to fear. I have developed that fear of being honest in my blog, and I'm wondering if I would rather write well written lies than crappy honesty?

What I would really like to do right now, is sit down and have a really good, fulfilling conversation with you. Yes I would, the kind of conversation where we make do without the everyday ritualistic politeness. I would love to know how you are really feeling right now. I would love to know what you're thinking, and what you plan to do. I want to know if you're sad, or if you're afraid, and I would like you to tell me about your best friend.

I'd like to know if you feel lonely, and I want to know if you think you could find someone you could tolerate for the rest of your life. I'd like to know if you love Malaysia, wondering would you stay, if you could see the kind of futuristic Malaysia I dream about sometimes. I want to know what you think of religion, and of God, and if you like him/her very much.

I want to know your thoughts on death, and beyond, and whether you are afraid of dying and not existing. I want to know if you sleep at night, whether you're scared or curious at how closely sleep resembles death.

I would like to know if you love me, or if you could learn to.